When to See a Sexologist?

By | November 16, 2016


Talking about how terrible one’s sex life is never a hot topic for conversation. We save it for a few private conversations, may be only with few close friends.However problems in the bedroom are not few and not trivial but in actuality a very real part of long term and also short term relationships. So when does a problem become serious enough to seek professional help and who does one go to for ‘those’ problems?

We will look at the first part of the question in a little while but the answer to the second part is quite simply, a sexologist.

What is a sexologist?

A sexologist is a professional can be a medical doctor, a trained physiologist or a certified sex therapist. Since sexology is a vast discipline involving both medical and psychological factors picking the right sexologist / sex therapist for your problem is key.

Say you have a chronic Erectile dysfunction, you would need to consult a medical doctor more than a clinical psychologist and for porn addiction concerns a psychologist will do a better job.

Now to answer the first part of the question:

What sexual problems warrant seeing a sexologist?

Here is a list of problems that you should probably seek professional help for if you are experiencing:

  • Lack of sex drive or no sexual arousal; this can put a great strain on a relationship and if it persists for more than a few months then it is advisable to get help.
  • Newly wedded couples or soon to be wedded couples; inexperienced lovers might have difficulty having pleasurable sex simply due to lack of information, there is no shame in asking a professional for help in a situation like this.
  • Psychological reasons for not being able to achieve arousal or orgasm; past traumas like rape or sexual abuse could severely affect one’s sex drive, sexual counselling could be invaluable in cases like this.
  • Erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation; these are problems that are more common than men realise and is it always good to get professional help to first find out the cause of the problem and then to help treat it.
  • Different sexual desire between couples; if the husband wants sex every night and the wife prefers sex just twice a week, this could lead to problems within the relationship. Sex therapy could actually save a marriage in cases like this.
  • Changes in libido; this is a very common problem among married couples and most commonly occurs after the children come along. Hormonal changes in the woman’s body, the exhaustion from caring for very young children and the overall stress of everyday life all greatly reduce sexual desire of one or both partners. If the problem persists beyond the first few years of having babies and toddlers then perhaps couples should consider getting help.
  • Difficulty having sex; if sex is painful or otherwise uncomfortable for one or both partners of if sex causes rashes or bleeding then get checked up by a medical sexologist at the earliest.
  • To enhance sexual pleasure; sometimes long term couples just need help to spice things up in the bedroom, a sexologist can answer questions on new and different sexual positions to try, how to enhance and prolong orgasms and could also suggest if the couple should use lubrication or any other aids to assisting a more pleasurable sexual experience.